Guys, Masculinity is not toxic!
Being the father of two young boys, trips to the zoo are often and always curious. On one particular Sunday morning, the boys and I had the amazing experience of hearing the lion roar. It was stunning! sensory overload; majestic, scary while intriguing. The boys grabbed me with fear while using those ten seconds of auditory horror to springboard us into a pleasurable day at the zoo.
After the boys went to bed that evening, I fired up the computer and immediately Googled “lion’s roar”; I had to know more. Three amazing statistics stood out to me after that night of feline analysis:
- Lions rarely roar during the day; almost always at dawn and dusk.
- A lion’s roar can be heard almost five miles away
- Lions sleep close to twenty hours daily.
The last statistic got me thinking of how a creature that sleeps twenty hours daily could possibly be the “King of the Jungle” and how that relates to modern masculinity.
Masculine men can learn from a lion.
Photo by Jeff Rodgers on Unsplash
Let’s face it, modern masculinity has been turned upside down as progressive thought takes further hold on American culture. Phrases like: “Toxic Masculinity”, The traditional patriarchy is racist, misogynistic, and bigoted which must be torn down. Gender confusion has men scratching their head or wallowing in fear. The “me-too” movement further solidified the male behavior into the dungeon of hell. Add to that current statistics that show testosterone levels for the male population at record low levels, and 63% of millennial men are single. “Incels” has caused controversy among males and females alike. We can not deny that our culture is in the midst of Male Morass!
Women want and expect dominant/masculine men in their lives. This cannot be translated into abusive, irresponsible, chauvinistic or dishonest men. Dominant men are necessary for the human race to survive and continue in an orderly fashion.
Dominant men are confident, caring, healthy, protective, responsible, dependable, honest, and trustworthy.
Masculine men are confident, caring, protective, responsible, dependable, honest, healthy [both physically and mentally], and trustworthy. Dominant men don’t cheat on their wives. Dominant men don’t get drunk and abuse their wife. They don’t cheat on her. He is responsible by holding down a job and providing for her and their family. A masculine man doesn’t lie, cheat, or steal to get by in life. Present for his wife or partner emotionally and financially when they need it the most. In summary: Sorry feminists; masculinity is not toxic. Irresponsibility, laziness, drunkenness, anger, violence, resentment, and infidelity are!
Sorry feminists; masculinity is not toxic. Irresponsibility, laziness, drunkenness, anger, violence, resentment, and infidelity are!
Just like a lion, except in rare cases, men are physically dominant over women. And for the most part, men are responsible with their physical dominance except for the few “bad apples” who spoil the crop!
Most modern “lionless” men fall into two wet buckets that only serve to pour water over any relationship they encounter. Men are not emotionally dominant over women but feel as though they must; rather than on equal footing. Conversely, men are not weaker emotionally and do not cower the moment they are needed the most. And. . . never whimper at a woman who is unapologetically confident, emotionally available, or sexually assertive. Yes, masculine men can exude a level of confidence that will overcome the shame or stigma society may bestow upon them while showing emotions in a controlled manner. Which brings me back to the lion.
Think about this: lions are innately responsible with their “kingness”. Almost a stoic kingness where they display confidence, security, and control without having to advertise it 24/7. The physical domination of a lion cannot be denied. Very few predators will attempt to take on a lion or his pride. Do lions roar all day? Use their physical domination against members of their pride? Get involved in unnecessary altercations with monkeys or elephants? The answers are profoundly no. A lion has earned the respect of his pride and the jungle while sleeping up to 20 hours per day! They don’t roar constantly or strut their “kingness”. They are not constantly in attack mode. They don’t abuse their pride; they protect it. In order for the lions to survive and continue their natural progression in the jungle, lions don’t whimper at the moment they are needed the most. The natural order of the Jungle has maintained itself for thousands of years because lions aren’t ever “unsure” of their identity or their place in the natural order. Do lions abandon their pride? NEVER! Do lions protect their cubs? FOREVER! The survival of their species demands that a lion stay, commit and protect their pride. After all, who is the only species to not only disrupt their home but the natural, enduring order of the Jungle? Man!
We can conceivably conclude that the jungle we call the USA has been in disarray because of the actions of these “lionless” men who refuse to or can’t display the character of a lion. They leave their pride to build another dysfunctional family without repairing the ills that caused their first disaster. Or abandon the responsibility of their partner and family for selfish narcissistic reason that only fester to affect themselves, those they abandoned, and society in general. The outcome for this lack of “kingness” are single mothers destined for a life of societal dependence and/or abandoned children destined for a life of crime or marginal success.
Think back to traditional masculinity and what brought on the progressive degradation of men and masculinity by yes,men! Many “lionless” men, unlike a lion, are in attack mode the minute they wake to the last breath before sleep. Screaming at their kids, cussing in traffic, yelling at their secretary, annoyed with their clients, and finally taking it out on their wife or partner that evening. Add to that the prevailing attitude of most men that life is full of winners and losers, a zero-sum game, and the attack mode is in full effect.
Or you have the modern “beta” male who lacks the skills or desire to take on the modern woman or healthy family. Introverted, hesitant, uncertain, timid characters that would never survive in the jungle, let alone with a woman and her “pride” to provide, protect, discipline and mentor their children and/or partner. Or to paraphrase “men who cannot change a tire or swing a hammer are hardly the men women would look to in a moment of crisis or need”.
To add to this dilemma and the need for modern masculine men is the rise of the “boss babe” a decade ago and the rebirth of “tradwives” just recently.
“Boss babes” thought they had it all with earning power, personal independence, and individual freedom to only leave them feeling empty and unfilled a decade later. Women now yearning for fulfillment from a confident, caring man who can go toe to toe with a strong, determined personality while lifting them up from the shadow of disappointment. Disappointment thinking they could have it all without a man in their lives.
The rebirth of “tradwives” only fulfills itself with truly masculine, responsible men willing and able to live up to the task. A man who is able to hold down a decent paying job to provide for his family and be present as a husband and father the rest of the time. He is a strong, responsible man who can live up to the task and empathy to provide and care for his wife and family. A man with understanding, respect, and trust for a wife who fulfills the daily tasks and duties to keep a modern household in order. A man who respects the chain of command in his pride without demeaning his wife and children. A man who may mow the lawn while his wife cooks. Is that utopia? Possibly, or its dual respect and responsibility for each other to maintain an orderly home. This takes courage, commitment, confidence, and respect for his identity.
Another interesting lion fact: Unlike a lion, most men have the stamina to outlast a lion. A 30-minute hunt for a lion requires 18 hours of sleep. They must use their attack mode wisely, or it could be life or death in the jungle. What we should not learn from a lion is to sleep 18 hours daily. Use our stamina to the advantage of our “pride”. Rather, be intentional and present with all our thoughts, words, and actions every waking moment. Let’s face it, man has done great harm to the natural order of our “jungle”, whether intentional or unintentional. Lions have survived for thousands of years because they have always respected the patriarchy within their pride and the jungle. If lions were not “lions”, the jungle would not be an orderly ecosphere surviving for thousands of years.
As “lionless” men, we have a responsibility to repair the damage we’ve inflicted upon our jungle; again, intentional or unintentional. The modern, irresponsible “lionless” man post WWII has ripped, torn, and shredded the fabric of our society by abandoning their children and betraying their wives. Add to that the degradation of the nuclear family also through the misdeeds of “lionless” fathers or “social justice warriors”. Behavior that has wreaked havoc and jeopardized the stability of our modern culture. Offspring who are violent, irresponsible, lost, hopeless, and suicidal. Single mothers in survival mode to just make ends meet. Mothers who do their best to be a mother and pick up the pieces and void left by a betrayed lion. We have far too many single moms and fatherless children who needed that father figure/lion to be there for our society to thrive and survive. Except in rare cases, fatherless boys who grow up to be “lionless” men; perpetuating this virus that infects our society.
Are men there to let our jungle survive and thrive?
Photo by Francois Hoang on Unsplash
A society that must stop the rise in children born out of wedlock. Based on the most recent statistics of 2021, over 1,460,000 children were born out of wedlock. That’s over 40% of all births in this country. The statistics become even more shocking when broken out by income, race, or education level. You guessed it, less educated minorities bear the brunt of this problem. Pre-1970, unwed mothers could not bear the stigma our culture bestowed upon them. The stigma was so great that few women would bear a child outside of marriage. The women who were willing to engage in sexual activity expected that her partner/lion would commit to marriage. Men/lions were willing to make (and keep) that promise, for they knew that in leaving one woman they would be unlikely to find another who would not make the same demand or stigmatize them for impregnating other women.
Our personal “jungle” may be vast or intimate so men here’s your chance! Don’t let progressive thought or cultural pressure stop you. Be that lion society demands, women want and children need!!
Twin Powers 